I See You (Please See Me): Chapter 13

A Stranger Things Fanfic

Trigger warning: mentions of abuse and eating disorders

Victor Creel’s house, in the dark, late at night, was a terrifying place to be, but Chrissy reminded herself that at least she wasn’t in the Upside-Down. She took a steadying breath as she crept around alone, on socked feet and clutching a blue lantern. Music ran through her headphones, and she clung to the lyrics like a lifeline.

Lucas peeked through the door, waving to get her attention. She looked up, and he held up a notebook where he had written “Erica found Vecna”. She nodded and followed him downstairs where Max and Erica were already waiting.

Erica pulled out her notebook and wrote, “Phase one?” Lucas nodded, and she grabbed her flashlight, running out to the playground.

Chrissy sat on one end of the sofa, and Max took the other, Lucas choosing a chair beside the younger girl. None of them wanted to sit still, but they had to wait for everyone else to get into position before they could move on. Chrissy tapped her foot gently on the floor, and tried to ignore the way the other two were watching each other. She felt like she was interrupting something private, and it made her feel guilty.

Max pulled out her notebook and started scribbling something, then held it up to Lucas with a grin. Chrissy pulled out her own notebook and tried doodling to give them some semblance of privacy.

It was difficult drawing with her left hand, but she moved slowly, and her lines weren’t too shaky. She lost track of time, her only measure being how full her page was of stars, hearts, and simple flowers. She had moved on to a second page before Lucas tapped her on the shoulder, gesturing for them to move up to the attic.

They climbed up the stairs, and Max set her lantern on an old trunk, then put her Walkman down and sat in front of the lantern. Chrissy felt a chill watching her, and clutched onto her own headphones tighter. For a long moment, nothing happened. Lucas and Chrissy stood together, watching the younger girl. Chrissy could see the tightness in the boy’s frame, the way his eyes were glued to the girl in front of him, the way he barely seemed to breathe. (It was horribly selfish at the moment, she knew, but she wished someone would look at her like that.) She laid her hand on the boy’s shoulder and saw him squeeze his eyes shut for a moment.

Then Max stiffened.

Lucas stepped away from Chrissy and touched Max’s shoulder. She didn’t move. He knelt in front of her and grabbed her arm, waved his hand in front of her face, and spoke. Chrissy couldn’t hear what he said through the music, but she could tell he was getting panicked. She grabbed his arm, and whispered, “I’m sorry.”

He swallowed and stood up, letting her lead him away. They stayed in the attic, pacing and watching Max, for what felt like days. Chrissy wished she could listen for any problems, but she didn’t dare take the headphones off, not with Vecna so close.

Lucas straightened, running back over to Max and cursing.

She pulled the headphones away from one ear. “What’s the matter?”

He shook his head. “It doesn’t look like it’s going well.” She started to walk over, but he waved her away. “Watch for any messages from Erica. If she sends something, just write it down, and I can translate it.” She nodded and turned to the window.

She spotted a flash of white, but it wasn’t Erica’s flashlight.

A basketball jersey.

She took a step back. “Lucas?”

“What’s the matter?”

“The basketball team is here.”

He cursed.

She turned back around to face him. “I’m going down. Lock the door behind me.”

“What? No, Chrissy, you can’t! Jason isn’t . . . he’s not okay right now, you heard Nancy!”

“I know, but I’m the one with the best chance of calming him down right now, and you have to keep Max safe. If he finds her like this, who knows what he’ll do.”

He wanted to protest, she could see it, but he looked back down at Max.

“I’ll be fine,” she promised. “It’ll be okay. Just . . . take care of Max.”

He nodded, and she ran downstairs, grateful when she heard the click of the lock behind her. Her mind raced for an excuse (she was good at those), and her hands settled on her gold 86 necklace. She tore it off, probably breaking the thin string in the process, but she didn’t care. She dropped it in a corner, then raced out the back door and around the building. She pulled her headphones down around her neck, but didn’t turn them off, even as she rounded the corner and nearly stumbled into a familiar figure.

“Jason?”

He looked up, eyes widening. “Chrissy?” He ran over, grabbing her shoulders. “Chrissy, what are you doing here?” He glanced up at her messy hair, and she tucked one foot behind the other, hoping he wouldn’t notice the small hole in her sock, or the tear in the hem of her skirt. “Your mother and I have been so worried about you.”

Her stomach dropped.

How long had she been gone? Nancy had called her mom just . . . two days ago. Oh. Oh, no. Her mom must be so mad. She locked the thought in its own little box in her mind and breathed slowly, trying to keep from hyperventilating. One problem at a time. She had to make the basketball team leave.

“I’m sorry.” The apology came automatically. There were a lot of things that came automatically, she realized. “I spent the night at Nancy Wheeler’s house. She told my mom, but then I hung out all the next day, and we talked and accidentally fell asleep, and I completely forgot to tell her I was staying another night.” It was close enough to the truth that she would easily remember.

Jason studied her, concern drawing his brows together. “So you weren’t with the freak?”

“What?”

“That freak, Munson. Your brother said he came to your house. I was afraid he had dragged you off and tried to hurt you.”

“No, no!” She shook her head, then stopped, realizing she sounded desperate. “No, he–he came because–”

His hands tightened on her arms. “He did come to your house?”

“He saved my life!” she burst out.

“What?”

“Eddie, he saved my life!”

Jason shook his head. “He tried to hurt you. He killed Patrick.”

“No, no.” She shook her head. She needed time to come up with a good lie. For now she just needed to stall. “He saved my life. He wanted to help me.”

Jason clearly didn’t believe her, but he sighed. “We can talk about this later. Right now we should–”

“Look who I found, running around the playground.” Andy ran up, dragging Erica along behind him.

“What are you doing here alone at night?” Jason asked, narrowing his eyes.

Erica gave him a scathing look. “None of your business.”

His jaw tightened. “Don’t you know there’s a dangerous person on the loose right now?” He leaned down, getting in her face. “Or maybe you’re with him.”

She saw it now. Nancy had called him unhinged, and with that mad light in his eye, trying to threaten an eleven-year-old, Chrissy knew it was true. She gasped.

Jason turned to look at her, and she stiffened for a second, then pointed at Erica with wide eyes. “You–you’re Sinclair’s sister, aren’t you?”

Erica blinked at her, then raised one eyebrow “What’s it to you?”

“Don’t talk to her like that!”

Chrissy grabbed Jason’s arm, dragging him back. “Jason, stop! She’s just a little kid.” She hoped Erica would forgive her for that." “We should–we should take her home. Her parents are probably worried.” Erica’s eyes darted over to the looming house beside them, but she didn’t protest.

Jason glanced around as well, clearly reluctant to leave. “Please, Jason,” Chrissy whispered. “I want to go home.”

It was a lie. Every fiber of her being protested at the thought, but Nancy had said she had her own monsters, and now it was her turn to face them to protect her friends.

He sighed and nodded. “Alright.” He pointed at Erica. “You’re coming too. We’ll take you home.” He turned to the other boys and lowered his voice, though she could still hear. “He’s probably not here anyway.”

Erica wasn’t paying attention. She watched Chrissy, clearly seeing what none of the boys could. Chrissy shook her head, begging her not to say anything.

Jason held the passenger door of his car open, and Chrissy climbed in, feeling bad for leaving Erica squished between the two boys in the back.

“Where did you get that?” Chrissy turned to see what Jason was referring to. He pointed to the Walkman headphones still around her neck. She had gotten so used to the constant music that she had forgotten she was wearing them.

“Oh, Nancy let me borrow it.” He would think it was strange if she didn’t take it off. She took a deep breath and tried to remind herself that Vecna was preoccupied. It didn’t help. She stopped the tape, but turned on his car radio.

“I . . . just wanted some music,” she said when Jason gave her a strange look. He shook his head, but said nothing.

When they reached the Sinclairs' house, Jason started to get out of the car, but Chrissy grabbed his arm, stopping him. “I’ll walk her up. The Sinclairs will be more comfortable with that.” He nodded, and she climbed out.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered as she and Erica walked up to the door. “We’ll both get in trouble, but I figured that was better than letting them find Max and Lucas.” Erica nodded. “When he gets home, tell him to call me so I know if everyone is okay.”

Erica nodded again, then glanced back at the boys in the car. “Are you sure you want to go with them? I can sneak right back out again. I don’t like this.”

How was it that all of these kids could see right through her when her best friends, boyfriend, and family couldn’t? “I’ll be fine.”

Erica rolled her eyes. “Anyone ever told you you’re a terrible liar?” She didn’t wait for an answer. “If you’re not back at school after break, I just know Steve and Nancy are going to break in and get you out, just so you’re warned.”

Chrissy smiled, feeling bolstered by the younger girl’s confidence. “Thank you. Oh, if you get the chance, will you tell Nancy I spent the night at her house again, but fell asleep before calling my mom?”

Erica rolled her eyes again. “Looks like I’m covering for everybody now.” She knocked on the door, then turned back to Chrissy. “But yeah, I can do that.”

“As expected, Erica got the promise of a long lecture as soon as the door opened. Chrissy was thanked repeatedly, which only made her heart sink further.

“Mrs. Sinclair said thank you for finding her,” she said as she climbed back into Jason’s car, and he nodded.

They rode in silence for a while, Chrissy twisting her hand in her skirt. The music helped a bit, but she was having a hard time paying attention to it.

Jason reached over and took her hand. The movement startled her, but she managed not to jump. “What were you even doing near the murder house?” he asked.

“I lost my necklace dad gave me, and I was afraid he would be mad.” He wouldn’t. He probably wouldn’t even notice.

Jason sighed. “Chrissy, a necklace can be replaced. You can’t just go running off like that alone at night.”

“I know.”

Erica’s words echoed in her head. Anyone ever told you you’re a terrible liar? No. No one ever had. No one had ever bothered to look past her “I’m fine’s” to her red eyes. No one bothered to look past her flimsy excuses for why she spent so long in the bathroom after lunch ever day. Past her “I’m not hungry’s” to the way she stared at their food. No one had, not her dad, not her friends, not Jason. Not until Eddie, Nancy, Max, and Erica, even when they had known her less than a day.

“Here we are.” Jason parked, then climbed out to walk her to the door. She tugged on the bottom of her jacket. At the rate she was going, she would tear it too and just make everything worse.

“Chrissy! Her mom opened the door before they reached the porch. “Where have you been? We’ve been looking everywhere for you!” She glanced at Jason. “Thank you, Jason, for bringing her home.”

“Of course.” Jason jerked his thumb back to the car. “I should drive the other boys back.”

Chrissy’s mom grabbed her shoulder. “Good night. We’ll see you later.” She dragged Chrissy inside, shut the door gently, then rounded on her. “Where have you been? What were you thinking?”

Chrissy shrank back. “I was with Nancy Wheeler. She said she called you–”

Her mom crossed her arms, raising one eyebrow. “She did.” Her words snipped off at the ends, and Chrissy dropped her eyes. “She called two days ago to say you were spending the night, but of course you couldn’t be bothered to call yourself, and then yesterday no one called at all. You couldn’t even spare a thought for your family, you selfish girl.”

“I’m sorry–”

“Sorry, isn’t good enough. I don’t know what’s going on with you lately. First you go to a trailer park of all places when you need to be focusing on your studies, then you try a skateboard so you can’t even do cheerleading the rest of your high-school career, and now you think you can just leave whenever you want without telling us.”

“I didn’t mean to–”

“Are you talking back to me?” Chrissy slammed her mouth shut. Her mom shook her head. “Clearly I’m wasting my breath. Go upstairs, now.”

She ran up to her room, shut the door, and curled up on her bed. She knew what was coming, and she wondered how long it would last this time. The oppressive silence her mother used as a punishment, hanging over everything and stifling everyone, later followed by sharper comments for several weeks. Or months.

She shivered. She didn’t know why she let it bother her so much, but just the thought made her stomach knot. She bit her lip, holding back the tears. She shouldn’t be complaining. Not when the others were risking their lives to fight Vecna.

Those aren’t the only kinds of monsters. You can’t live if you’re letting other people kill you slowly.

Maybe some monsters were the thoughts in her head every day telling her to shove her fingers down her throat. Maybe some were her mom’s pointed comments at every meal. Nancy had told her so, and she wanted to believe it. Wanted to believe that this was something she could fight, something she could eventually leave behind.

She remembered Eddie stitting beside her in the RV You be careful too.

If Max could let Vecna into her mind, if Eddie and Dustin could distract those bats, if Nancy, Robin, and Steve could find Vecna and kill him, she could fight, herself. Fight the thoughts every time she passed a mirror. Fight the urge that pushed her into the bathroom after she ate.

And maybe now she didn’t have to do it alone.

Someone knocked on her door, and she tensed. “Come in.”

To her surprise, Brian walked in, shut the door, and climbed onto her bed.

“One of Jason’s friends called,” he said quietly. “Mom said you couldn’t come to the phone, but he wanted to leave a message.”

“Which friend?” she asked, clenching her fists in her blankets.

“The new one. The freshman.” She breathed a sigh of relief.

“What did he say?”

Brian cocked his head. “He said everyone got home, and that you’re probably tired of music now, so you don’t have to worry about it.”

Relief washed over her, and she felt like crying, laughing, screaming, something. She squeezed the blankets tighter and stayed on the bed. Brian studied her, clearly wanting to ask, but he didn’t, and she was grateful.

“Mom doesn’t know I heard,” he continued, “so don’t mention it.”

She mimed zipping her lips, then grinned and grabbed him, pulling him into a hug. He let it last about two seconds, then pulled away, making a face.

“What was that for?” He raised an eyebrow. “Are you still on pain meds?”

Pain medicine. That little pill bottle the hospital had sent home, still sitting on her nightstand. When was the last time she had taken some? The pain in her arm, while unpleasant, had been the least of her worries, and she had completely forgotten she had medicine for it.

The realization finally pushed her over the edge, sending her into a fit of giggles that she tried to stifle by shoving her sleeve in her mouth. The giggles turned to tears, and Brian stared at her, alarmed.

“Definitely still on pain meds,” he muttered, getting back up and backing out of her room slowly. “You should probably go to bed. Good night.”

“Good night, Brian! Love you!”

“Love you too.” Then, to balance it out (because how embarrassing it was to tell your sister you love her), he made a face, sticking out his tongue. He shut the door, leaving her alone with her thoughts again.

The room wavered. It had been far too long since she’d slept, and the laughter and tears wore her out much more than she had expected. She turned out her lamp, not bothering to change out of her clothes, and was soon fast asleep.

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